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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22522870">A Rooster Laid an Egg on a Roof (which side does it roll down?)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheHomestuckWhovian/pseuds/TheHomestuckWhovian'>TheHomestuckWhovian</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Miraculous Ladybug</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Allergies, Crack, Gen, Lila is mentioned but not relevant, Pigeons, and so is Gabriel - Freeform</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 11:27:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>737</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22522870</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheHomestuckWhovian/pseuds/TheHomestuckWhovian</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>There is no safe way to directly confront this akuma.</p><p>Luckily, Ladybug has it covered.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>233</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>A Rooster Laid an Egg on a Roof (which side does it roll down?)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">


        <li>
            Inspired by

            <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/555766">the bonus from this Scarlet Lady page</a> by zoe-oneesama.
        </li>

    </ul></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Adrien did not like his odds.</p><p>(Or his father, at the moment.)</p><p>Liliane was his recent modeling partner, and, unlike Lila, was not terrible. In fact, it was nice and one of his least uncomfortable photoshoots in awhile, because Liliane was professional, respectful of his personal space, and fun to talk to. And having someone who understood his suffering with feathers was nice too.</p><p>But, like everything, Lila had to ruin it. She threw a huge tantrum over not being the model picked for the shoot, one that would make <em>Chloé</em> cringe. And, for some reason, his father sided with the unprofessional amateur instead of the model who knew what she was doing, and so when Lila pitched a fit, Gabriel insisted on redoing the entire photoshoot with Lila instead, and humiliated Liliane in front of everyone.</p><p>And now Liliane was Bullseye, an akuma with perfect aim who had proven too quick to the draw and too good at aiming with her energy pistols to get close to. His tail had already been singed by her warning shots and finding an opening or a blind spot was tricky.</p><p>It was with utter relief when Ladybug dropped onto the roof next to him, a confident smile on her face.</p><p>"We need a way to get close to...her..." He noticed the way her grin grew wider at his words and found them stalling. "You already have a plan, don't you?"</p><p>"Lucky Charm!" she called, and a medicine bottle and a bottle of water dropped into her hands. She passed both to Chat Noir, insisting, "You should take that now. It'll all go crazy in about ten seconds."</p><p>...What the hell was she going to do?</p><p>He carefully took two pills as instructed on the bottle, washing them down with water. And it was just as he was capping the water bottle that he saw a new player enter the field.</p><p>He was dressed in an orange suit with feather patterns in a gradient to red on his arms and legs, and over it was a red and orange feathery cape with a red hood. And in his hand was a long, golden horn.</p><p>...What the fuck???</p><p>"My lady, what the fuck?"</p><p>"Just watch Monsier Poulet," Ladybug insisted, as the man held up his horn dramatically. And Adrien barely had time to process the name before he heard the man's call.</p><p>"Wake-Up Call!" he shouted, before pressing the horn to his lips and blowing.</p><p>There was a moment of silence, before hundreds, maybe thousands of pigeons filled the sky, flying around Bullseye in looping, disorienting patterns. Her eyes were darting around, her targeting ability hindered by the chaos. And then...she began to sneeze.</p><p>Adrien blinked with understanding.</p><p>"The Rooster miraculous' power can be used to summon and command all animals in the area to your aid," Ladybug explained cheerfully. "Not usually the best suited for city environments, but this time it was perfect. And because this wielder is an adult, he doesn't have a time limit."</p><p>Bullseye's ability to target was already seriously diminished by the chaos, but her feather allergy was the damner. Ladybug had spared Chat Noir with her Lucky Charm, allergy medicine, but Bullseye was in no state to fight properly as Ladybug jumped down from the roof, the cloud of pigeons parting to let her in, and she grabbed Bullseye's bandana and ripped it in half, releasing the butterfly.</p><p>Adrien couldn't believe it.</p><p>They didn't even have to fight.</p><p>"Miraculous Ladybug!"</p>
<hr/><p>Marinette was relieved that the plan went off without a hitch, and she quickly allowed Tikki to recharge before going to track down Monsieur Poulet, who was sitting on a dumpster in an alleyway with pigeons crowded around him.</p><p>"Thank you for your help, sir," she told him, and he smiled happily in response.</p><p>"It was no trouble! I'm just happy to help for once." He slid the ring off his thumb, the suit vanishing in orange light and replaced by his gray suit and fedora. "I know I've caused a lot of trouble for you and the city. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to make it up to you."</p><p>"Of course," Marinette assured him. "If the Rooster is ever needed again, you will be the first person I look for. Thank you again, Mr. Ramier." And, with that, she zipped off from the alleyway, leaving the man with his pigeons.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This idea occured to me, wouldn't leave, and so I wrote down 750 words of just pure crack. The akuma I literally came up with on the spot, the only requirement being that you couldn't safely get close to her but a cloud of pigeons definitely could, and that she would share Adrien's allergy to feathers.</p><p>All in all, I wouldn't say I'm proud of this story, but I had fun writing it so...whatever?</p><p>I wanted Monsieur Poulet's name to be a sideways reference to Mr. Pigeon. I chose the masculine form of chicken instead of the word for rooster because this may have been crack but I was not going to call Xavier Ramier's superhero form <em>Monsieur Coq</em>.</p><p>Also, yes I based the title off of that one joke, because nothing about this story is serious really.</p><p>Edit: I just realized. This is my 69th fic on AO3. There is nothing about this goddamn story that isn't a joke.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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